The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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