You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
bring money and cleavage
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Drunk is not a location!
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
