Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
