Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
