Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
