I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
