need another drink. this is the easiest way
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
