then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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