just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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