I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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