I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
