Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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