I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
