Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
