WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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