I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
