So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize