I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
