My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Boobs are out for the taking
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
