He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
