spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
