operation harelip BJ is a go
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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