You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Randomize
