drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize