they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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