sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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