Me. At least after what I've been through.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize