I hate all girls vehemently.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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