; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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