Ketchup is God's man juice
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I need water and some morals
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
