he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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