I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
