every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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