you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I want to have your abortion
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
