I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
