this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize