how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
