Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
