so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
