so that wasnt chicken after all
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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