your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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