pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
