Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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