dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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