Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize