The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
