So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
