btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
My feet surprised me
So apparently I’m into choking now
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