This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
