gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize
