I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Randomize
