all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize
