Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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